


like the very gods in my sights is he

by falqons (golden_gardenias)



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Fluff, M/M, Short & Sweet, really it's just me being juvenile
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-28 11:33:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13270578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/golden_gardenias/pseuds/falqons
Summary: Nursey and Dex are gross but also grossly in love.





	like the very gods in my sights is he

**Author's Note:**

> i basically wrote this in the shower. one of my new year's resolutions was to contribute more to fandom, so here i am, banging this out before i overthink it and talk myself out of it. hope you enjoy!

"Hey."

Derek looks up from his notebook to see Dex scooching across the bed to him until their shoulders touch. "Guess what," he says, leaning closer.

Derek suddenly leans back, his expression wary. "If you burp in my face again I'm not kissing you for like, a week," he warns. "Or holding your hand. You won't get so much as a _wave_ from me, buddy."

Dex snorts, shaking his head. "I told you, that wasn't on purpose!" he insists.

"Uh huh. A likely story. You think you can just wiggle your ears at me and all will be forgiven, right? Well I'm not falling for it." He turns decisively away from his boyfriend, crossing his arms and smiling at the expression he knows is on Dex's face.

Dex doesn't give up, winding his arms around Derek like a koala. "Come on, guess," he urges.

"Hmm . . . you found the word you were looking for earlier?" Derek suggests.

"Well, actually I did, but that's not it," he answers, pressing a kiss to his shoulder.

"You . . . broke 30% fluency on Duolingo?" Dex has been trying to learn Spanish in an effort to bond more with Nursey's family, and it's been slow going. The words always come out stiff and stilted, so he'd downloaded the app to get more practice in.

"No, not yet." He drops another kiss, this time on the side of Derek's neck.

"Two-week streak?"

"Oh my god, it's not about Duolingo," he laughs, kissing Derek's cheek.

"Your snap streak with Chowder can finally compete with mine? You're gonna get that tattoo you've been talking about? Oh, is it the piercing you--"

"Alright, you're done. Stop guessing," he demands, covering Derek's mouth and dragging him to lie down with him. He maneuvers them until Derek is flat on his back with Dex braced above him. "The correct answer is 'I love you,' dummy."

They spend a moment grinning goofily at each other. "Oh really?" Derek asks. "Prove it."

"Well," Dex starts, leaning down to kiss Derek's forehead. "I've spent the last ten minutes staring at you instead of doing my homework. You kept biting your lip and holding it in your mouth, the way your mom is always complaining about."

"Stalker. Why you so obsessed with me?"

"Don't know," he shrugs. He places his hand gently on Derek's cheek, running his thumb across the apple. "Maybe it has something to do with you being the best, most beautiful person to ever walk the earth?"

Derek laughs, reaching up to trace Dex's smile with the tip of his finger. "That's gay, babe."

"Yup," he replies. "I'm a raging home-of-sexual."

"Lucky me."

"Nah, I'm the lucky one. I can't believe you put up with me."

"You can be a handful," he agrees. "You're getting better, though. I've just about got you house trained."

Dex repositions himself so that he's lying on his side and drapes an arm around Nursey's waist. "Glad to know I'm improving," he murmurs, kissing the shell of Derek's ear.

They lie in comfortable silence until Nursey moves to face Dex, wrapping an arm around his waist in turn. "Guess what," he whispers.

"What?"

He leans in for a slow kiss, warm and lingering. "I love you too."

Dex has only just closed his eyes when Nursey burps. It’s small, but the smell is strong, and he has never felt more betrayed in his life. “We’re breaking up,” he deadpans, sitting up and shoving his laughing boyfriend away.

“Now you know how I felt!”

“That was an accident! _This_ was a calculated attack!” he protests. “Practically chemical warfare!”

“Oh come on,” Derek scoffs.

“That was bioterrorism, Derek. You just violated the Geneva convention _and_ the eighth amendment.”

“Worth it,” he replies smugly, lying back down with his fingers laced behind his head. “It’s not like you can stay mad at me anyway.”

Dex hesitates before moving back to the bed, watching Nursey closely. “Fine. But now we’re even. No more bodily functions.”

“I swear. Truce?” he asks, extending a hand.

“Truce.” Dex lays back down with him, but he’s already trying to think of how he can play off an accidental fart.

**Author's Note:**

> nursey, when dex sits in his lap the next day only to fart on him: this is what i get for making a treaty with a white man


End file.
